Money Diary #34

Morning: Up around 7:30, brush teeth, and make scrambled eggs for everyone. No meetings until 11:30 this morning, so drink a cup of tea and go shower. Prep for my afternoon meetings. Since my afternoon meetings run until 3, eat an early lunch at 11 of cauliflower fried rice & spicy fish stew with onions. I get a FedEx package from work for my upcoming trip. 

Afternoon: Power through meetings until 3. My last meeting is with my manager, I follow up on some to-do items from that, and call it a day. No more meetings for the week! I put an out of office up for tomorrow morning, since I'll be running a few errands with parents. An afternoon snack of pineapple coconut cake/tres leches, hashbrowns, and a cup of tea. Parents head out to Home Depot, and once they come back, Mom excitedly tells me that they got a free hydrangea plant since it was the last one!

Evening: Walk around the house to get some cardio in and clear my head. Dinner is cauliflower fried rice & spicy fish stew with onions. More walking around the house, brush my teeth, and Apple tells me I've walked more than 15,000 steps every day so far this year! Exhausted and bed around 11.

Money Diary #33

Morning: Up around 7, drink a cup of tea, and turn on my laptop. Keep an eye out on email, see that my 10:30 call gets moved to a different day, and get ready for my 10 am call. The call goes well, and then I go shower. Dad air-fries shrimp, and I have that along with cauliflower fried rice for lunch.

Afternoon: Jump on a noon call that ends early at 12:45. Prep for calls tomorrow, and then log off for a bit to make a Kroger run with parents. Shop the clearance aisles (Stevia mango/ginger drink, a banana nut cookie, cauliflower & broccoli hashbrowns, orange juice, coconut water, coconut water with espresso, veggies, Italian bread, tater tots, and Hershey's cookies 'n cream colliders) and back home by 2:30. Everyone splits the banana nut cookie which is so yummy. Keep an eye on my inbox, and then Dad air-fries an afternoon snack of cauliflower & broccoli hashbrowns for everyone. They are super tasty, and have that with a cup of tea.   

Evening: Read Money Diaries for a while (what is about them that is so relaxing?!). Dinner is cauliflower rice, air-fried salmon, and Italian bread. Brush teeth and bed around 11. 

Money Diary #32

Morning: Up at 6, help Dad with laptop stuff, and drink a cup of tea. Make scrambled eggs for everyone, and sit down to work. Work for several hours and then connect with my manager. I am really tired but want to power through before I take a break for a shower. 

Afternoon: Work for a while, shower, and then finally eat lunch (cauliflower fried rice & fish stew). I am still hungry so I have a pineapple coconut cake & tres leches combo for dessert. Work for another few hours and then call it a day. I am so exhausted. Dad air-fries the plant patties, and they don't look great, so I have negative expectations of it. One bite later, and HOLY CRAP -- THEY ARE SO GOOD. Text SO the great news, lol. Have a cup of tea, followed by a glass of orange Fanta afterwards.

Evening: Eat some homemade sugared cottage cheese. Read for a bit since Dad is on a call until 9. Then dinner is cauliflower fried rice & veggies, and bed around 10:30. Here is what I learn:

• On why it's important to remain mentally active: He retired at 65 and then developed dementia a short time later. The main issue was that he had no plans to remain active. Rather, too many hours (and subsequently days) were spent in front of the TV for hours on end.

• Average or rich: "Average folks are not rich. Rich folks are not average."

• On income: "Income does not matter if you spend away all your income" and therefore have no savings.

• On why mental health is so important: "You can't pour from an empty cup."

• On being grateful for SO: "If you're in a good relationship, it feels like a haven of comfort and relaxation to spend time with your significant other." 

• On being on the lookout for real estate deals: Someone mentioned "There will be folks that overspent on their houses. You can count on it. And, that is the source of cheaper housing down the road." I asked, "How do you locate people who overspent on houses?" He replied, "Why do you need to locate them? The average gross saving rate is less than 5% and almost everyone has no emergency fund. Hence, almost all house owners overspent on their houses."

• On inflation and real estate prices: He sold his house for $460k to a young couple with kids that had clearly stretched every possible time to afford it and were only able to do so because of interest rates hovering around 2% at the time. Zillow says the house is now worth over $600k. On the one hand, that couple bought more house than they could afford now that things cost more in our inflationary environment. However, with inflation, their wages could have gone up, and they are locked in for 30 years at an incredibly low interest rate. According to him, people will generally leverage themselves to the hilt to hang out to their houses. Which could mean no more family vacations, no eating out, whatever it takes to keep the house, they will do it. For his own situation, he is worried he will never see the opportunity to buy back the house from the couple for anything near what he sold it to them for (less than two years ago!), and he'll be stuck continuing to rent. In a way, he was the one who downgraded his lifestyle, not them. And it sucks because getting back into that kind of house just doesn't seem possible anymore.

• When meeting someone for the first time, ask yourself: "What tribe do I think they belong to? 

Money Diary #31

Morning: Up around 7:30 and drink a cup of tea (without milk and sugar for the next couple of weeks). Log on for work and monitor emails that come in. Drink another cup of tea and go shower. Get ready for my afternoon meetings. An early lunch of cauliflower fried rice and an omelet.

Afternoon: Calls between 12 to 3, and then review a project that comes in. Dad asks if I can help him with more laptop stuff tomorrow morning, so I will get up early and do that. Another cup of tea to round out the late afternoon. I read a couple of Money Diaries, including one which reminds me how COVID made me realize that I'm in a much better headspace when I am alone (or with SO or parents) and not making small talk with people.

Evening: Read for a bit, dinner is cauliflower fried rice & another omelet, and bed around 10. Here is what I learn.

• What the pandemic did for me: It illuminated a gap between what I wanted from my life and how I was actually living it. 

• Ideas for an indulgent bath: Make a lavender bubble bath and snack on mint chocolates while in the tub. 

• What a great way to view body changes: "A lot of my clothes don't fit, but I've been hesitant to buy new clothes. However, I know the best way to feel comfortable with my new body is to treat it with respect and not try to squeeze into things that feel uncomfortable." 

• On how to understand other people: People are logical, even if they don't understand their own triggers and inputs. To understand their behavior, you need to understand their goals, why they chose those goals, and what they see as blockers to their success. By doing this, you can develop enough empathy to understand how they see their world. 

• On Buddhism: "Chop wood, carry water" means there is no goal, purpose, or endgame to life. What we get up and do everyday is life. That is all there is. Rather than try to fight this and think that "if only X would happen" or "once I get to a certain point, everything will be better," lean into the rhythm of it. Today, I got up and chopped wood & carried water. Tomorrow, I hope I will be here to do the same, and that the people I love will be here with me. But that is not up to me and not anything I can control, and so even if I get up tomorrow & everyone I have ever loved is gone, I will need to chop wood and carry water, and I will do that. It doesn't have to be perfect; it just has to get done.

Money Diary #30

Morning: 

• He leaves for his sailing club around 7:30, I get up, and read the Python book on the sofa for a while. Finish part 1 of the book (bookmark p. 89 as the starting point for next time), brush my teeth, and get dressed to head to parents' place. I weigh myself before I leave, and it's not as bad as I had expected. I do, however, need to cut down on the amount I've been eating lately (including sugar). 

• Once I arrive, read more Python, eat breakfast of toasted Hawaiian rolls & tea, and also try a bite of the pineapple coconut cake Mom tells me they found in the clearance aisle at Kroger. It's really good! Mom also tells me that the neighbors finally fixed their fence, so there is no longer a gap between our yard and theirs. As it took them nearly a year to do this (and was very annoying to say the least), I am super grateful and also wonder out loud if the neighbors are thinking of moving. Other parts of their fence had also been broken for the past year, and they've had those fixed as well. My mom really likes being in the backyard, and felt uncomfortable with the gap that existed for the past year, so I'm grateful that she can enjoy her backyard again in peace and solitude. Lounge on the sofa for a while, catch up on blogs, and then go shower. Watch a few reruns of old Scooby-Doo episodes. Download the free Saturday Sampler deal from Albertsons which is plant-based meat this week. 

• I read an article on Jake Gyllenhaal and how "he has found that professional disappointment can yield personal benefits." That makes me pause and think about a few years ago. I had been working towards a rotation in Europe, and in the fall of one year, my then-manager (who I admired and respected a bunch) had indicated it was in the works for me to move to Europe early the next year. Then, my management changed, and when I asked new management about my Europe rotation, I was told no. Needless to say, I was heartbroken and very professionally disappointed. In hindsight, though, a couple of months after I received the news I wouldn't be heading to Europe, I met SO. So I am a living example of how professional disappointment can lead to personal benefits. The Jake Gyllenhaal article also highlights that while the journalist kept asking about the noise, Jake focused on the signal. That's an important reminder to me when I work, I'm always asked about the noise, and I need to focus on the signal.

Afternoon: Dad makes air fried tilapia, and we have that with lentil stew for lunch. I immediately fall asleep on the couch afterwards. I hear my mom saying they're off to Albertsons to get the free plant-based meat, and then the next thing I know, I hear the garage open when they come home. Apparently, I was out for an hour or so, haha. Eat some tres leches cake, send SO a picture of the free plant-based meat so he can get it too, and then have ladyfingers with tea. Read for a while, and here is what I learn:

• On what financial independence means in corporate America: The right boss makes the difference. Once you are FI, focus on picking a boss (vs. a company), rather than letting things work the other way. 

• On how to improve your professional life (part 1): Talk to more people, and by doing so, you will learn how to become more reasonable. You will learn how to live in the mess -- more in the gray area and less in the black-and-white. A black-and-white version of the world leads to two consequences: (a) perceiving life events in an emotional way and (b) a distorted view of the world because you can't see nuance.

• On how to improve your professional life (part 2): Part of my job requires me to be a therapist. Let the other side vent and then guide their emotions. After all, I'm getting paid to listen to what they're saying, point out what emotions they are feeling, and guide those emotions. 

• On how the future can throw curve balls: A doctor enjoys her job now but could have surprises like a couple of malpractice cases that may make her bitter and disenchanted with medicine. She should not take working for many years and future income for granted.

• On how I can add value: I need to keep up to date in my profession, but my value lies more in doing the right thing, the right way, over and over again. I am not inventing anything new. 

• On having negotiating power: He is looking for a house and wants to pay $5 million for it. Instead, he should tell the seller he is no longer interested, that his initial offer is off the table, and that he is lowering his bid to $4.75 million. The key is you have to be willing to walk away from the deal. That is when you have the power.

• On a high net worth: People with high net worth have to put that net worth somewhere -- it can be in index funds or in a house.

• On what an optimist is: "An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery."

• On the difference between ambition driven by insecurity vs. ambition driven by the desire to self-actualize: The former begins by feeling you're not enough. The latter is an affirmation of life -- it's an attempt to do the most you can do with the body you've been given. It doesn't compete with others but with yourself. It is the act of pure desire rather than the fear about not feeling enough.

Evening: More Scooby-Doo, dinner is air fried tilapia & fish stew with rice, and brush my teeth. A couple of work projects came in earlier this afternoon, and I think about getting a head start to the week. Decide to do it tomorrow & summarize what I've learned about Python instead, and bed around 10. Here is the Python summary:

• How to approach programming: Use the "Grilled Cheese" method. You don't need to be a Michelin-starred chef, but it is useful if you can cook a meal for yourself. In a similar fashion, if a piece of code solves a program, that's all we need it to do. 

• What a programming language is: A programming language allows a human to manipulate the computer's physical hardware by switching transistors on and off.

• On visualizing a script: A script is a set of instructions with conditional checks (questions that are answered with "yes" or "no"), operations to be carried out, and an endpoint (which is a "Yes" answer to the first conditional check question). When drawing it out, use a diamond for conditional checks, a rectangle for operations to be carried out, and an oval for the end of the process.

• How algorithms can be political: Algorithms can help make the world appear in certain ways over than others by ranking, classifying, sorting, predicting, and processing data. 

• When using Twitter's free APIs: APIs are software that request data from Twitter. The free APIs do not let users have 100% of the data they request. The only way to get 100% of the data that match your search criteria is to buy the data from a Twitter-approved vendor. When you extract data through a free Twitter API, you're limiting the scope of data you'll receive and you also have to be mindful of Twitter's terms and conditions regarding data usage.

Money Diary #29

Morning: Hear the 6:15 alarm ring, get up, and brush my teeth. Shower, get dressed, and get ready to meet his friend before the car meetup this morning. We head to a Starbucks in the wealthiest part of town, and once we arrive, I love how this Starbucks looks and feels like a rustic Italian villa. He wants a cold brew and we use a pre-paid card (from more than 15 years ago!), so I don't count it when tallying up today's spend total. Friend arrives and gets a drink, and then we chat for a bit. We then all head to the car meetup, and I am so bored. It's the same cars, the same people, and the same conversations. Thankfully, the local Rotary club has free drinks so I initially grab a hot chocolate and then a lemonade as the morning goes (or rather . . . drags) on, lol. Another one of his friends and wife arrives, and I'm so happy to see her. We take pictures together. 11 o'clock rolls around, and we finally (!!) leave. Head to the nearby Target where he wants to get gold golf balls (lol), then to the Bath & Body Works next store to grab a free small mini lotion with our coupon, and finally to the Goodwill Boutique nearby. The regular prices here are like non-Goodwill prices, and even at half off purple tags, those prices are still too high for my taste. Though I tell SO we should stop by here anytime we're in the area since the quality of the clothes is really good. 

Afternoon: Lunch is Taco Bell (2 beefy melts and 3 chicken burritos for us) ($10.83) after which he drops me off at the local library and then goes to play tennis with his family friend. I thought this library would be bigger so I'm initially kind of disappointed. I find a comfy chair, plop down, and surf the web. As I'm sitting in the library, I realize that while it's on the smaller side, it's fairly cozy and has an okay-ish personal finance section. I pick up a couple of books that look quasi-interesting and migrate over to the soft chairs next to the floor-to-ceiling windows. I start reading one book and get bored within a few pages. I go back to surfing the web, reading various online articles, and end up reading my Python book. Bookmark p. 34 as the starting point for next time. SO asks how I feel about Olive Garden for dinner with the family friends. I'm okay with OG and he picks me up from the library around 5:30. His friend's wife sends the pictures from this morning, and sigh, I look so heavy. I start to come up with a plan on figuring out how to lose weight.

Evening: Head back to the family friends' place and hang out with all the kids for a while. There are four kids and the mom. The eldest just got accepted with a full-ride to our state's top college and received an acceptance from UC Berkeley as well. After half an hour, we all head to OG for dinner. SO gets unlimited soup and salad and I get the Tour of Italy with zuppa toscana. It's all really tasty but so filling. I also eat like 10 Andes chocolates at the end of the meal and am stuffed. As soon as we say our goodbyes and are back in the car, I immediately unzip my jeans as they are uncomfortably too tight, lol. Make a quick stop at the wealthy town's Kroger and I immediately notice how there aren't any clearance racks. I tell SO that the citizens of this wealthy town probably expect to pay full price for everything, lol. We grab a couple of Bang energy drinks that we have coupons for ($1.72). Head home, pour a glass of Space Coke (which is disgusting and tastes like a gingerbread/red velvet cake drink), and watch him play GT7 for a while. Apparently while watching him, I fall asleep on the couch around 10, feel someone hug me & ask if I want to head to bed, and then ultimately migrate over to bed around 11.  

Eating out = $10.83

Groceries = $1.72

Total = $12.55

Money Diary #28

Morning: Wake up a bit past 7 and realize it's Bridgerton Season 2 day!! I have a bit of work to do before I can settle in with Netflix, so I send a couple of emails and hunker down for a few hours with work. Around 10, my boss calls me letting me know she'll be flying into the main office next month and if I'd be interested in going as well. I think it'd be a good idea for me to go, though the introvert in me wrestles with anxiety. I also struggle with showing up to HQ heavier than I'd like to be. Ultimately, I decide to go and connect with our admin to book flights & hotels. 

Afternoon: He wants to go buy the golf clubs he saw yesterday, so we first stop at Costco to pick up lunch of hot dogs and a mocha freeze ($6.48). Then stop by the golf store where he buys clubs, and once we're home, eat lunch. Connect with our admin one more time and get confirmation on the hotel & flights. I'm kind of nervous but also really excited. Get a couple of things done for work and send them off. He sees a golf glove on Craigslist that's apparently right in the neighborhood so we go there and buy it ($5). Then stop by Albertsons to pick up more Space Coke (LOL) and the free butter ($4.09). Watch the initial episodes of Bridgerton, and Pen's statement of "when you're invisible, it brings all the amusement you want without any of the expectations that popularity brings you" simply amazes me. 

Evening: He makes mushroom & egg rice for dinner, and I keep watching Season 2 of Bridgerton. OMG, I love this so much. Power through all of the season and finish a little after midnight. Bed around 1. 

Eating out = $6.48

Clothing = $5

Groceries = $4.09

Total = $15.57